Wednesday, July 04, 2007
When things seem to be on the wrong side of the bed.
Everything else just don't get right.
Everything that I do or did just don't get done smoothly.
Is it a psychological effect or is it a Dilbert effect?
I don't know.
Everything just not in my favour.
One last thing that I am still hoping to get it right is my last interview result.
Yet to hear anything after the interview.
But am hoping that things will turn out in my favour.
For I have been longing to get into this position.
So that I can have another profile to add on.
And it could lead me to a better prospect.
Probably it could be my next career advancement.
Positively thinking of it to happen.............................
Posted at 7:59:09 pm by chatpolka
Tuesday, July 03, 2007
If we think, we are sacrificial, look at them...
(If I think I have done lots to sacrifice....look at them and remind myself)
If we think our job is tough, how about him?...
(If I think what I am doing now is tough then remind myself - what about him?)
If you think your salary is low, how about her?...
(If I think my salary is low then I remind myself - what about her?)
If we cried because of money, think again!
She cried not because of money but because she can't go to school...
(If I cried because of money then remind myself - she can't even afford school.)
If any of you think study is a burden, how about her?...
(If I think what I am doing is a burden then I remind myself - what about her?)
If you think walking is so tiring, think again!
Can u understand his feeling?
(If I think what I am doing is tiring then I remind myself - how does he feel?)
If we alway feel like giving up, think of her perseverance...
(If I think of giving up then I remind myself - where's my perseverance?)
If we think we have so suffer in life, do you suffer as much as him?...
(If I think I had suffered in life then I remind myself - have I suffered as much?)
If we are complaining about our transport system, how about them?...
(If I am complaining about our traffic system here then I remind myself - they don't even have a proper platform.)
If we are complaining about our environment, how about them?...
(If I am complaining about my environment then I remind myself - how have they survived?)
If we say the society is unfair to us, how about him?...
(If I think the society is unfair to me then I remind myself - what about him?)
Posted at 9:31:12 pm by chatpolka
Monday, July 02, 2007
I don't know how much longer I can hold my patience?
His unreasonable behaviour and nonesense is wearing my patient out.
I am afraid that I will loose control of my patience
And do the most destructive thing by throwing out everything in my mind.
I hope I won't have to do that.
Trying very hard to keep my cool.
Not because of anyone but for the sake of mum.
Nagging at me for every details that I do for him.
Complaining about every small details that must be done his way.
Always assuming that he is right.
Most words used by him are very piercing and hurting to hear.
If not for my cool I would have tell him off long ago.
Keep my cool....Keep my cool....Keep my cool....
Smile like an idiot....Smile like an idiot.....Smile like an idiot.....
Be like a fool....Be like a fool....Be like a fool....
Anyway maid was deported for good reason.
Indeed she had misbehaved.
Got pregnant for about three months by some unidentified foreign worker...
That she got to know probably during one of her Off Day or...
Probably introduce by some other maids in the same block...
Had told and advice her many many time to becareful of whom she get to know.
Yet turn on a deaf ear.
That's the dramatic ending she ended up with.
Deported and never ever to come back to work here.
Now pregnant and who's gonna be responsible?????
Off Day for maid is doing more harm than good????
Posted at 2:45:06 pm by chatpolka
Friday, June 29, 2007
I think I am very fortunate.....
To have friends whom care.
During this down period of mine
I have been receiving encouraging words and supports.
"Smile and you will see rainbow.... "
"...life is hard, but such things makes us stronger..."
"...send a smile with the heart out to people we like and who need
assistance. There you stand in the first place. I hope it will help..."
"...CHEER UP ya I believe you can overcome this..."
"...just call if you need a friend to talk to..."
"...take care and see you smile again..."
"...hang in there..."
"...God loves you so trust him with your situation..."
"...feeling better today..."
"...have peace within and get some slumber..."
"...have a good rest and take care..."
"...let's have dinner and talk about it..."
"...like to share and breathe out the stale air inside you...cheers..."
Indeed I felt I am fortunate and bless with such good friends around me.
Thank You my friends and I will love you all always.
Posted at 5:50:15 am by chatpolka
Monday, June 25, 2007
Been unable to sleep again.
Toss and turn and still not able to get to sleep.
Much as I would love to turn in.
But the moment I close my eyes,
The images just play in front of me.
For I know if I still don't sleep
Then it's bad for my health and bad for my concentration.
I just can't help it.
The image just keep playing.
It is not of any fantasy images but the tears rolling down the corner of Pa's eyes.
This is second time this month that I have seen it.
Have tried to ask him what had happened but he just won't tell me.
That's what make me even more worried.
With his mood swing now - I'm just feeling more uncomfortable.
Am afraid that his mind will run wild and think of silly things.
Mum........If you are around me now......
Please tell me what should I do?
This arithmetic problems is getting more and more complicated now.
I am just finding clueless to any lead to find a solution.
For I probably would have guessed what's happening...
But I don't wanna stir the sediments and create more issues now.
Just in a dilemma as to what should I do.
And I am also getting very very tired in solving this arithmetic problem.
But I know I have to continue to try to solve it for your sake.
Maid has been deported.
Was told she had been under performing lately.
Telling lies and been in bad companies.
Eversince she had her Off Day.
Would have expected such things to happen.
Had observe it for myself.
She had been dolling up herself and wear pretty clothes.
Not concentrating and on the SMS most of the time secretly.
When ask her to errands she would take longer than expected to return.
Now with the maid deported.
Not sure how things would turn out.
Just have to pray hard that the table would turn around.
Posted at 3:31:41 am by chatpolka
Friday, June 22, 2007
Posted at 2:03:14 am by chatpolka
Saturday, June 09, 2007
This week hasn't been a great week in life.
For I have learn another important lesson in life.
It is not a very pleasant lesson but I think it is a good lesson.
I have now understand this Chinese proverb clearly.
(Literally translated: One has to safeguard & do for the sake of oneself else one will suffer eternal perdition)
I now believe how true this is.
For two over years I have been unconditionally giving my best.
Not for the sake of myself but with a gratitude for having a job.
With the thanks for providing me a job when I needed it most.
I put in time and effort to help build the system.
Try to improve the strain relationship that Boss had with all the staffs.
All because of his temperamental behaviour.
Everytime he throw his unreasonable temper or tantrum on the staffs.
I would try to be the middleman to help mend the relationship between them.
By putting in a good word for him so that the working environment is not strain.
Time and time again he took it for granted that he is always right.
His behaviour is getting from bad to worst.
I have been keeping the lowest profile of all.
For I understand and know his characteristic so try to avoid a clash.
But this week has been bad that he's trying to provoke me.
Yelling and scolding at me over a distance of 100m away.
For problem that wasn't even my fault and of which I try to help solve.
Which was actually his own doing.
Everyone around the circumference or range was looking at me with a stare.
It really make me feel bad and not knowing where to put my face.
People that don't know had thought what I had done wrong.
At that moment I rationally stomach the humiliation and get the problem solve.
Got the problem solved for Him and was waiting at least a word of Thanks.
Not a single word but still with a sulky face and no action of remorse.
That had me on fire now.
I can't stomach this humiliation just like that.
For I have my dignity too.
I march straight into Big Boss office asking for a fair verdict on this.
Told Big Boss that I would prefer for a transfer to make my life better.
Just can't take this kinda temperamental behaviour anymore.
(Anyway his tempermental is a known fact to Big Boss for a long time).
Not once for such humiliation but many smaller one that I can forgive.
Big Boss said he would look into the matter.
Went on two days of rest days.
Came back to work.
Nothing seem to happen so I took it as usual.
But Boss attitude toward me had changed.
Been a little hostile and the words are little heavier.
I didn't want to pick a fight on all this petty little action.
So had been ignoring his petty behaviour.
Things got bad when he found some small issue to pick a challenge on me.
It is just that he didn't have me to explain the situation and again jump the gun.
(Again I wasn't in the wrong - it's just that someone didn't pass my message).
His conclusion is that I am not interested in working here so get the hell out of his section.
He march me with him to Big Boss office.
I know things have sour this time.
Even before I could say anything -
Big Boss give me a utterly disappointed decision.
"Things had come to this state, I think I will transfer you to XX section because someone had just resigned....."
What the hell is all this about?
(Hey! You idiots just didn't care about my feeling....)
I ask Big Boss, " Now what have I done wrong and the table seem to have overturn?"
"It is now as though I am the problematic one in this tussle?"
Big Boss just try to avoid this question by giving lame excuses,
"I am not good at words....blah blah blah....I think it is good for you since you ask for a transfer....blah blah blah....".
"I am not saying or thinking whose right or wrong but let's not strain
the relationship here.....Let's continue to work as a team...."
Oh my ass! What nonesense is this? Now I am totally victimise.
Where's my dignity?
(By the way)
The damn ass Boss was sitting beside with that none remorseful attitude.
Said a word or two...
"It is my management style....blah blah blah.....".
"Since you ask for a transfer, permission granted immediately...."
THIS IS UTTERLY DISAPPOINTMENT AND DISGRACE.........................................
Anyway I am alright.....Nothing will make me fall anymore.
I have grown stronger over these years.
This is just only a little setback.
I will take it and I will learn this good lesson in life.
Will put this new lesson in another chapter of my life.
I will rise again.
And when I rise I will be walking even taller than before.
I will make sure the midget will have to look up on me.
I am not into any revenge for sure but prove myself.
I can be even better than what they think I am.
Posted at 10:48:42 am by chatpolka
Sunday, May 27, 2007
Got back home after visited Dad and had dinner with him.
His health is deteriorating by the days.
It is detriorating at a rate that is faster than I thought it would be.
From his outlook I can see that he is loosing lots of weights.
Especially over these two weeks when he is unwell.
Not only I am seeing that - even aunt is saying that too.
(She happen to visit Dad today)
The nurse is observing that too when I fetch him for his review.
Since he was warded the last few weeks ago.
Eversince he came home from the hospital.
He is getting weaker and weaker each day.
Now he needs the support of others to move around at time.
Getting up from the sitting or sleeping position seem tougher.
He needed more time and effort to do it.
As he has been complaining of giddiness and nausea.
That could be due to low blood pressure which I suspect.
Probably the anti-biotic that he had been taking weaken his system.
Would love to see him improve in his health by staying optimistic.
But the reality isn't as optimistic.
He himself has been setting negativity mindset.
Has been sprouting lots of negative remarks lately.
That isn't going to help him - instead will do more harm.
I am just crossing my finger and praying hard for his recovery.
Posted at 10:30:25 pm by chatpolka
Friday, May 11, 2007
The weather is getting very harsh these days,
The ray of the Sun is really burning the skin,
The heat is getting more and more unbearable,
Drought and heatwave are creating havoc for many,
Water catchment drying up, Snowy mountain and Ice-berg melting,
Living organism, animals and creatures habitats are destroyed,
The forest, trees, plants and shrubs are disappearing,
The sea level will be rising and flooding our civilisation.
Many many more scenerio can be thought of and will happen.
All because of us - human.
We are destroying the land, the Planet Earth that we live on.
We want to advance in term of civilisation but at the expense of the Earth.
Can we not at the expense of the Earth but still advance?
Let us all just do a little a day to Save The Earth.
Reduce the wastage of energy and resources,
Reuse the resources that we have,
Recycle the waste that we dump everyday.
Be clean and green about the environment.
In that way only can we start to see a change in our weather.
My appeal to all human being on this mother Earth.
I have started to do my little everyday for a long time,
but have told myself to do more these days.
Shop at the supermarket with my own carrier bags these days.
For I buy all that I would need and fill the bag that I have.
That has also force me to stop buying unnecessary foods and stuffs
which would go to waste and rot due to overbuying.
I reuse the bag and recycle the container as much as I could etc.
That has help to save on the resources we have.
If the supermarket can also reciprocate those that help to save the earth
by giving a small token of appreciation in a rebate or small discount.
I would forsee more people will start the drive by reduce, reuse and recycle.
One hand will not clap - it needs both hands to clap.
So the commercial world don't just think about only making $$$$$$$.
By starting this little campaign will not only save them $$$$$$
on expenditure on the materials.
At the same time it will bring in the crowd more often.
Like I used to do my groceries once a week or even once a month.
Now I do it like twice a week to get the things I needed often.
Isn't it a WIN-WIN situation for all?
Posted at 7:27:31 pm by chatpolka
Thursday, April 19, 2007
Hi friends and readers.....
It's been a long long time since I last update.
For I have been on land for too long now.
So I will disappear for the next three days to go under the sea.
As you would have guess so....
I am going DIVING.
Just need that sea-water to revive me....
It's been a long time that I last dive.
Long for the peaceful moment down under the sea.
Swim with the fishes, feel the streamline of the current flow...
Have to have that before the unwelcoming shift patterns.
It's been told that the new shift pattern will start 28th May.
Well just have to review it to see if I can cope with the changes.
Working till 0115 hrs is really really making me a very unhappy guy.
Anyway shall see...
Meantime just enjoy my DIVE........
Will update again once back from the trip.
Posted at 10:58:24 pm by chatpolka